Sea -To - Shore

(-Cage Of  Cares-)

                Parents, they are the inseparable part of our life. They are the one to make us best what we can be. Indeed they are the Godfathers of our achievement. They are the Guru’s, they are the source of Resource needed :P. .

                Of course and that is hereditary  phenomena of nature i say.  We love them for the same. We love them bcoz they don’t  let any of our most -of-the wishes remain incomplete. We love them bcoz they parent us, care us, and all that you can think. .

                But. .  but yes there is this one phase where few of the same things we start feeling needless. We feel “NO, Please Don’t Be Like That. .”. We start feeling those cares unwanted. Irrelevant at times. We just start feeling caged as we start growing.

                But yes we are growing. We are by now grown up. We have friends around who know us by name. And there are those other mutual friends who know us bcoz of our name. We are building a status we know. We are having a name we know. We are talking to people, we are communicating, we are socializing. And we know it all well that, I M GROWN UP.

                So, now we know how to be in society. What are the people around us. How they are. And what type of people could be,  ranging from the scale of VERY GOOD to Worst. So we are learning day by day about own capabilities through this socialization. And we want to know more. More about people and so about own too.

                But no. This is not then what parents want. They don’t want you to get exposed. They don’t want  u to go around with so many people from different colonies. They  don’t want  you to talk to people  who they think as “Kay Mahit Kasa Asel?”.

                Here comes the phase of Our and Parents clashing. Now we are getting to know the world. So many things that happen in world. We are getting idea of interest of our self. And it so happens that, what we want to do is exactly what parents don’t want us to do. They think we might get drifted away in  the company of people. We might deffer from our family hood. They think we might get wrong. We may get foul. We may get ruined. We may get in bad habits. They just start finding our actions wrong.

                Yes at a certain point they come out to be really true and saver. But at some point they tend to be over caring. Over reacting at some situations. We find them restricting. We find them narrow at thoughts. Narrow at traditions. And more, we start feeling their actions doubtful over us. This gets to the extent that we indulge into family arguments, try telling them what we want. And that's were comes few change in their thinking.

                They call us irresponsible. Immature. Arrogant. Arguing person to elders. They find us some one who is not a good “baby” of them any more. We become useless. Out of hand. They think us SPOILED. .

                My dear friends. .  Is that really really true? Is that what we want? Is that how we want to behave? Is that true we are spoiled, useless ? ? Probably and really i think NO!!!

This is really not what we are. What we want. What we have got changed into. And that's really not how we want to be.

                We want to learn. We want to get exposed. We want to TRY. We want to Fall. We want to Get Up and we want to remember all what we did as “EXPERIENCE”..

- - -

Dear Parents,

                We really really love you. We really respect you and we do know you care. Please don’t find us ruined. Please don’t call us irresponsible. Please don’t restrict us. Give us a ground to play. Leave us to fall and let us to learn to get up and start again. Yes but do hold our hand and don’t let us fall in dark. Because from this is how you have gained the knowledge, and this is how you have your Experiences. Let us also gather some of them, so that tomorrow we could also share.  Dear Parents, we too love you. .

Sea -To - Shore

  

INTRODUCTION

Life is like a ship dwelling into a water body that has no definition, dimensions and also no directions. Pretend,  you are put on this small boat by god when created, and when you open your eyes to see this world you find yourself put in a boat in this big water body. .

You wonder  “What is this? Why m i here? How will i get a Life?” . . You are stressed. You are unhappy. You get to know that you are put in this boat which is wondering no where in this sea and that you have to dwell, sail, voyage yourself and find a life. . Where is life? Find a sea shore, there you find life, bcoz as known “ LIFE IS ON LAND “. .

The life that we live after we are grown upto understanding (age 16)  is life that god has set, which is no different than a vast sea. . You have no idea of the color of life, no idea how long it is, no idea where it will take , no idea which direction to start with. . Just like a lost sailor waking up from a bad dream to find he is left alone in a lost sea. .

Choosing a right path is very important in this phase of life. Bcoz, good start is half done. You have entered into a world that is fantastic, admirable, trendy, stunning, glam and attracting. But this is what punctures you. Now i wont refer YOU hence forth as i would like to go with mine, to share what it was like for me to dwell in same situation. .

A tell of every one, and for everyone to know how it starts with ruins and how it ends with balance and settling. .

Therez no idea what it will be now after. Bcoz the door to Heights was now opened. It was like a gate way of a park, for which a child is waiting to open bcoz he knows  there, beyond this gate,  are a lot of places to go and play, alot of rides to amuse, and alot of heights to can climb. And he just don’t know which one to take 1^st and live it. He just wants to 1^st see the whole thing and then just try and take one.

We do the same. Without having any idea about it (may be a study field, a course, a trend, a HABIT, a attraction, relation and may be behavior) we just start to practice it. We don’t have time to think its scope bcoz we just want it, bcoz others are doing it. We have no own brain. We have no own mind. We find youngsters doing it. We find it attractive. And we start finding our self in them  in our thoughts. This is where we start loosing our self. We start loosing the track. We start loosing respect of own and we start finding our self right and smart.   

 (note: "Sea-To-Shore" will be posted in parts)

For Last Time

As the time goes by, killed by hours of waiting,
The hope in last tears is revived.
When I choose to give in, I was so mistaken -
Couldn’t see that one reason to fight.
Then you’ve opened my eyes to the truth.
Please, forgive me for all times I lied
To myself… All I need now is you.

Just the rain reminds me of latter tears.
I close my eyes and dream again.
A breath of wind… I feel you here,
You’re life, still flowing in my veins,
And in each tear - each drop of rain -
I see your face… can’t live without you.

You’re every tear in my eyes,
Leave everything but you behind,
I’m locking all; I’m turning back
For the last time,
For you’re - my life.

Come to my dreams and stop the time,
Let know you’re here, my angel.
You’ve broken your wings - I’d give you mine,
And give you hope, from you once stolen.
You’re more than precious memories,
You’re my twin soul - your heart I’ll treasure.

And every time I look at the dawn,
Far at the horizon see your eyes.
You’re miles away, you’re there alone -
Your heart’s with me - I’m still alive.
I can’t pretend, I won’t even try
To escape from this love and to lie to both us…

You’re every tear in my eyes,
Leave everything but you behind,
I’m locking all; I’m turning back
For the last time,
For you’re - my life.

15 Days

16/5/2011

At times what is called as the darkest period of life, the feeling of Hopes has always remained in every ones life. A time comes when every one looses their faith in everything, a things that keeps you binned with the way of life is a gut feeling that you developed in the mean period of attachments.

15days.. Gonna be hard time. Not even completed with a quarter period, when it had just started to blossom and grow, a half month span of separation is truly not wanted. Getting used to the touch, the hold, eye sight and smile, its expected to keep it coming on and on more everyday. 

But now its turn off of 15 days. The texts, the chats, the says and bye’s. Off for 15 days. Meeting time will remind, memories of past meets. Here we would have been, there we would be sitting. Really its not a small gap.

A new schedule has been decided, get up, smile, realize and again smile. Look at the calender, check the marked date, “Oh! More XX days” and….feel the pain. Make a guess, locate on the mind map, imagine the way, its too far….. again a pain. Get down the shower makes remember the play, touch over the heart and kiss on the head. Tears can be let flow now, shower to help drain.

How hard hands feel, keys though soft but nothing to read. Screen is blank mobile is crank, battery is low, where should I go? Reason doesn’t exists, no place no outings, 15 days such days like life doesn’t exists.

17/5/2011

Night passed over, u there m here. Over the conversation of phone i could hardly hear. But it felt so good, a voice that cheered and removed all fear. Cell phones making it so easy, even at a altitude network isn't busy ;). Ur voice though shatters but u r safe and perfect thats what matters. Distance between two, miles increasing, a chat over the phone Smiles increases.

Yes of course, i have a fear, people can be bad becoz ur soo Dear. Feeling of possessiveness ponders like fear, unknowingly heart stumbles, bcoz u aren't near. Words of advices hence come forth, but then it realizes u r true and worth. 

18th and 19th/5/2011

While counting on days remaining, they r getting cut down, but then still even remaining 10 days are like an year to go still. So eventually this is a part of the most important but not understood theory that Einstein proposed 'Theory Of Relativity'. Ahh! days going with a hard time. Emotions are building high tide in the vast ocean of heart that keep dashing over the brain walls and cracking my all so got control over it. . 

Problem is, to hear u i long all the time, but then when i hear the voice over the call, suddenly realizes the distance that the waves cut through to reach that that even they delay. . No! I don't wana hear u. I feel missing, incomplete and low. Another secret iz i also feel jealous when  You told me the funn your having. Thinking about the scenery u must be witnessing i used to just go mad about it. I love adventure, i m a trekker but its not me its U there. :( 

And this all mix feeling ultimately made me so sad and low, I decided to be hardly on message. I tried a day but i couldn't keep it up the whole time. More than usually, thoughts were creeping in ma head. a night b4 yesterday was so Awww! I was just thinking over n over while night. No, this wasn't what i expected. "Concentrate" was my aim while studying, but no i couldn't!

Aw! Wish I could fly was the only wish i was keeping . . 

20th-21st/5/2011

What you think its that easy to keep blogging or writing  down your thoughts. For me it all goes with the mood. And talking about the mood, it is worst from last few days. A day can be tolerated  or two. But, its the most difficult time when u actually don't know when u gona next hear that person again. And pain is when u are accustomed to the voice, to the touch, to the sight and HER but, you have no idea where the person is? Which corner of the world, at which heights of these Himalaya's! No clue of their returning and you are just waiting and wanting a Talk.

This is the situation where you are enduring you patience for a person. Waiting is fi9, its not hard but its pain when u know u gona meet but don't know when? And its same. It ultimately makes go pale, low, uninterested in things, slow, unhappy and incomplete. Start feeling unlucky, unpleasant, filthy and shit about the distance. 

U don't wish to cry, bcoz u don't want to show weak. U don't want to cry bcoz u think its matter of few days, u don't cry bcoz it looks stupid. . And then u kill your heart and let veins cry inside. . This is when u just want to be alone and silent bcoz u want to cry inside and don't want to let any1 hear it. . . And then you look beside and finds it empty again. . .

25th/5/2011

Finally when you hear the person over the phone after so long and hard waiting, all your emotions are jolted to your throat to put them out. Thats the situation when you have heavy voice. U are blank, you just can't find words to explain the person over the phone that how much were you waiting. At such times two things happens.

You are over whelmed, wet in eyes and your throat is grasped by the hearty feelings. And so U just can't speak. While your heart is screaming  out the feelings. You are numb over the phone and the other person is waiting for your reaction. But that person if may don't understand, its a total turn down and the emotional scene turns into expectations unfulfilled.

Where as if the other person is your perfect match, when u pick the call and say " Hellooo! " the voice that is felt is enough for that person to read your heart. She can feel it through phone that U really Missed her.

Often it happens same. And the conversations turns into drops of tears and lots of cares. It happened exactly same. To hear the voice across the Himalayas back to me, was like enchanting the lovers cry. The moment the name was seen blinking on the phone mind sent a shivering bolt all over the body and heart churned into delicate feelings. Here U can't stop them rolling down your cheeks to your lips. They just flow out. They are emotions, with wet touch of Tears.

But now what happens is the moment of happiness, which is surpassed by eager feel of eyes to see the person. Now waiting for the remaining time is not possible. Don't want to live those so near coming few days meeting. Whole body just pushes and demands the touch the feel now right now. It just wants to meet right at that moment. You get insane, captivated, entangled, helpless under the strong emotion of the weak heart. 

Its not a simple to deal with these situations in life when you are put to test just at the right moment when you have got the feeling with the partner, routine of meeting, talking, and desire to hold Her. Its hard, its tough and if you sustain the walk without expressing it, YOU HAVE ACHIEVED IT.

26th,27th/5/2011

Sometimes unknowingly either of two, someone hurts. Sometimes unknowingly something  is unnecessarily explained and the worm of doubtful questions creeps in mind. Actually, you are totally fine and great till that, but suddenly when you are told something, that hardly matters, but in a defensive way, it make you upset. Upset bcoz questions arises in mind that just suck away all your wonderful conversation. 

Trust is a most important part of a relation is always true. But also knowing the opposite person, his views about us, his understanding towards us complies it. So better understanding and smart timing should be retained.

28th/5/2011

Now, finally when you have your loved ones there in front of u from a long journey and from no where contact since days, the joy clinches on the face, the warmly feel of the HUG, the skip of the heart beat and the wet eyes with smile fat smile.

Its the feeling of COMPLETENESS when you hold in your arms, when you kiss on the forehead and look into each others eyes. 

I MISSED YOU 

Is the only feeling that we express. And then the kiss completes the missing love and the words I LOVE U. .

After living a life of 15 hell days finally you are here with the fairy, the lady of your life, the ecstasy of emotion, girl of million reason of happiness, the killer smile flasher and THE SWEET HEART.

Treasure her, love her, hold her and care her. Bcoz she made you realize Love in Life. U have by now realized her need. LOVE IT and LIVE IT together. .

(P.S: 15 days belongs to me. . ) 

What Is Missing

The miss of a lost love can darken the soul. Wishing to see her in the moonlight or day can cause pain and it does in HIS heart. Her walk was of a Angel and her eyes were of the Blue. HE lost in this world without her. Her touch her sound the kiss of forever and the words that came to be. She left off HIS arms, but the pain will never go away. Some nights HE cry praying for her to be here, but only alone HE knew how the pain burns like fire slowly burning the heart. Tears are the only memory of her and her smile. No cure could be found to stop bleed of Heart. So many things HE still wanted to say to her and so much to do for her. Take a walk through a park and hold hands see the birds fly free with the wind or to make love on a beach as the kiss the feet. She was HIS true love and to see her go away killed HIS soul.  HE did all HE could to make her time happy, HE talk about memories and stories, went to the tree outside the house were HE asked her to marry, but most of the time HE just watched her get longer and away.On the day of she left HE blew out the candle of THEIR dreams never to light it again. Wherever you are HE'll always be here waiting for the day to once meet again. For when the day comes tears of the past will be gone and tears of the future will lead the way. HE LOVED HER TRULY AND DEEPLY for HE WAS TRUE. . . -[K_A_]

if you. . . then its. . .

if u love someone bcoz u think that he/ she is really gorgeous-

then it’s not love _ it’s “infatuation”…

if u love someone bcoz u think u shouldn’t leave him bcoz others think u shouldn’t-

then it’s not love _ it’s “compromise”…

if u love someone bcoz u think u cannot live without his/her touch-

then it’s not love _ it’s “lust” …

if u love someone bcoz u have been kissed by her/him-

then it’s not love _ it’s “inferiority complex”…

if u love someone bcoz u cannot leave her/him thinking that it would hurt feelings-

then it’s not love _ it’s ‘charity”…

if u love someone bcoz u share everything with her/him-

then it’s not love _ it’s “friendship”…

but if u feel the pain of the other person more than her/him even when she/he is stable and u cry for her/him – that’s “LOVE”…

if u get attracted to the people but stay with her/him without any regrets-

that’s “LOVE”…

if u let her/him go knowing that she/he has to go but she/he doesn’t wants to-

that’s “LOVE”…

               

                                                                                          -[k_A_]